The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships (Paperback)
Posted on | October 26, 2009 |
Review
‘A careful and compassionate exploration of women’s anger.’ SUSIE ORBACH ‘An inspirational book.’ RELATE NEWS ‘Provides a whole new way of looking at your problems. A good investment.’ Amaxon reader, 2001
–This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
“Anger is a signal and one worth listening to,” writes Dr. Harriet Lerner, in her renowned classic that has transformed the lives of millions of readers.While anger deserves our attention and respe (more…)
Great pictures document your life. You need the Best Digital Camera that your money can buy.
Posts Related to This Article
Tags: Anger > Changing > Dance > Guide > Intimate > Paperback > Patterns > Relationships > Woman's
Comments
12 Responses to “The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships (Paperback)”
Leave a Reply
October 27th, 2009 @ 5:05 am
A large number of books on the topic of anger have recently come into my house — how to recognize anger, what it means, and how to “control” it. This is the only one of these books that I liked. All the other books on this topic seem to treat anger as a loss of control, which should be repressed. In fact, they seem to be about impulse control more than about anger. (I have nothing against people learning to control their impulses, I just don’t think that it’s the same topic as the topic of anger.) Luckily, I did not pay for any of these books, so I can just be glad I read this one, and forget about the others.
In this book, Lerner treats anger as a signal that something is going wrong. She explains that only when we address the “something wrong” in a useful way will the anger go away. Then she explores the “dances” we engage in, in our attempts to make ourselves feel better. She suggests that most of our attempts to make ourselves feel better focus on the person(s) we think made us mad, rather than on ourselves. She compassionately and wisely shows how to disengage from the anger and the counter-productive patterns, while staying connected and acting with integrity. However, she also acknowledges the effect that this sort of change can have on other people in the dance, and she provides guidance in maintaining oneself in the face of countermoves.
Fundamentally, this is not the kind of self-help book that provides 10 easy steps to ridding oneself of anger. Instead, it describes a different way to think about anger, and discussion of the ways in wich one can respond to anger. No easy steps, just a way of thinking, which can radically change the way one engages with the world.
October 27th, 2009 @ 5:20 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
Dance of Anger
Dr. Lerner shows how to work through anger instead of acting out or reacting to it. Very helpful for resolving inner conflict and finding the source of anger.
October 27th, 2009 @ 5:32 am
Many years ago someone recommended that I read this book but I didn’t bother. I thought “Yeah right, another self-help book. I don’t think so!” I was so wrong. This book dares to take on that ugly, taboo emotion: ANGER! If you never learned good solutions for understanding and dealing with your anger, this is a book you need to read. It is filled with insight about anger. It also offers constructive solutions for getting rid of anger, and improving relationships with people who make us angry. It deals with generational patterns of anger! This book is not just for women. Men, too, could learn a lot from reading this book and putting it’s suggestions into practice. Very highly recommended.
October 27th, 2009 @ 8:09 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
Excellent
The book is wonderfully written and I highly recommend it for any woman dealing with a lot of anger.
October 27th, 2009 @ 11:45 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
Very Helpful
I found this book helpful in understanding why I get angry and how to deal with situations that cause me to become angry.
October 27th, 2009 @ 3:30 pm
5.0 out of 5 stars
The dance of anger
Wow! When I bought this book I thought it was going to target a hot temper or a nice lady who suddenly blows from holding it in. It’s soo much more.
October 27th, 2009 @ 3:54 pm
5.0 out of 5 stars
Life-changing
This book has literally changed my life for the better. My husband and I have been having difficulties for the past four years and I had been trying everything I was able to…
October 27th, 2009 @ 9:35 pm
5.0 out of 5 stars
Amazing!
This book helped me realize things that didn’t even cross my mind! I recommend this for every woman, even if you don’t think you have problems in any relationships!
October 27th, 2009 @ 10:16 pm
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Dance of Anger
I have never said this about a self-help book, ever. It changed my life, and is still changing my life, and I will be reading it more than once.
October 28th, 2009 @ 2:50 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
The counselor’s favorite book
I was going to a counselor trying to wade through the emotions that were crippling me. How can such strong emotions create such paralysis?
October 28th, 2009 @ 4:43 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
extremely insightful book
The Dance of Anger took me by surprise with its clear descriptions of anger in women and its causes, manifestations, and consequences when not handled in a healthy manner.
October 28th, 2009 @ 6:37 am
5.0 out of 5 stars
Most important book I’ve ever read
Dance of Anger is the most important book I’ve ever read in my life. It helped me get through a very challenging time, and I read it again every once in a while just to revisit…