How Do You Feel About A “christmas-birthday Parent”?
Posted on | August 5, 2009 |
You know, the kind of parent, whether it was because of a divorce or just not being there, that just sends Christmas cards and birthday gifts?
Do you think they should even send gifts? Or stay out of the child’s life all together?
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4 Responses to “How Do You Feel About A “christmas-birthday Parent”?”
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August 5th, 2009 @ 5:38 pm
My parents divorced when I was about 7 and before my dad started becoming involved in our lives when I was about 12, he use to just send cards and gifts. Though the birthday card always had some funny phrase like cards do, what it really should have said was: “Here’s a gift ’cause today’s the day you were brought into this world and I’d look like a REALLY crappy person if I didn’t give you anything. Here ya go kid.”
It’s out of pitty. They feel like they HAVE to give the kid something because it’s a birthday. Being a parent, bringing gifts, money etc 1 day out of the 365 days doesn’t make up for the other 364. Though a young kid may not understand this at first, they will realize it after a while.
Having a relationship and spending time together is the best present. If you’re not going to do that, just don’t bother.
Best Wishes =]
August 5th, 2009 @ 10:10 pm
My parents are going through a divorce and i hope they love my brother and i and not do that.
August 5th, 2009 @ 10:56 pm
My dad is that way, and now we are the same way to him. He gets a present and card on Christmas, Birthday, and Father’s day (although we don’t know why we bother for Father’s day, I guess just to keep up appearances). Other than that, we don’t talk. He could have stayed out of our lives and it probably would feel the same. He didn’t want a family, and he made it perfectly clear.
Having children doesn’t make you a parent anymore than having a piano makes you a pianist.
August 6th, 2009 @ 3:33 am
My sons dad only shows up on or around my sons bday. It is a huge hassle, my son doesn’t want him here, and just adds huge amounts of stress to our lives. My son knows he only shows up to make himself for good and that it has nothing to do with him. My son just views it as just another interruption to his day much the same as having to stop on the way to the pool for gas. I think if you aren’t willing to be a parent all time at least communication wise then you should leave the child alone. Kids know when parents are doing stuff to rid themselves of guilt.